Masculine and feminine unbalanced due to fear

My recent Reiki session, learning to trust in myself.

This week I received a long overdue reiki session with a multi-dimensional healer Rachel Rivera (aka Rara) here in Las Vegas, it was incredible, and got an in-depth insight into what is creating a temporary obstruction within myself.

Besides the cleansing of my energy, the main focal point I received from the session was that my masculine and feminine were unbalanced due to getting lost in the fear of expression.

The masculine aspect of me is ready to take action while the feminine not allowing it because she is in fear. Creating a standstill in my creativity and expression.

What came to mind when Rara told me this, is how I have been dealing with it for as long as I can remember. 

There are so many different factors that influenced me to be timid in expressing myself fully, mostly rooted in childhood which led to a multi-layered domino effect, on how I perceive myself and how I think others may perceive me, layering a lot of fear since then that led me caring more of how the world accepts me.

At this point in my life I am learning to trust my heart's guidance more than ever before and is requiring me to express more on topics that I know I will be judged and rejected for, even with my heart being in the right space with good intentions, I still find it difficult to find belief in me.

It takes more than knowing I am never responsible for how other people respond, and how fear is an illusion, to be able to fully release the gripping terror it has over my inner child.

As much as I may like this to be a thing of the past and to be the most confident unapologetic version of myself now, I know It takes time, courage, and action.

It’s like the saying “Face your fears head-on”.

Creating new (often uncomfortable) experiences that help form new neuroplasticity to aid old patterns of attachment. (the masculine aspect)

Reassuring the mind (and inner child) along the way continuously building trust. (the nurturing feminine aspect)

Honestly, I expect this to be something I will continuously need to work on, because all the other huge points in my life with the familiar focuses have pushed me to grow into a new higher version every time, just with different forms of expressions that I am needing to do at that point of my life.

That's the beauty of healing it gets really hard at times, you feel lost, life feels scary and chaotic, and yet that is where you grow the most. 

Through deep self-discovery, you remember who you truly are, deepening the connection to your heart, and learning to trust its guidance. Being gifted with the recognition of your life's purpose as you form your new path.

So many great beautiful manifestations arise when you are aligned with your heart, spirit, mind, body, and nature. I can validate this :)

Also, another beautiful reassurance I received from my session is I am meant to share with the world my healing, it is part of my act of service. Sharing with you something like this a vulnerable aspect of me not only helps me find more courage to continue to follow my heart. It can bring the receiver some support. I know I am not alone on this (even though at times it feels lonely).

If you are going through something familiar in your unique way, I would absolutely love to know in the comment section below (subtract reader app).

I am incredibly grateful you are here with me and can’t wait to see how this space blossoms

Much love to you,

dd

p.s Here is Rara's Instagram handle if you are interested in getting a reiki session, she also does long-distance reiki @iamrararivera